I can't believe 2015 flew by just like this. It was truly an eventful and significant year for my nation as we celebrated our nation's jubilee. It was also a year where many significant milestones of my life was marked. It was the year when I turned 30. It was also the year when I got married to my best friend.
It was also a year where unusual favor was bestowed upon my life from above with people and with Himself. Burning Hearts was established in a well located area right in Orchard Road with many young lives were awakened to live a life of consecration and prayer. Through that influence and impact, I got the privilege to work with many different youth pastors together with me team members from Burning Hearts. We mobilized and rallied 900 young people as well as fathers and mothers of this nation to assemble for a night of consecration on the eve of our Nation's 50 (8/8/15). The goal of the assembly was to seal a generation for the next 50 years modelling after the consecration that King Josiah made (2 Chron 34 & 35) that preserve an entire nation.
I thank God for all that He has done and the amazing milestones that was established in 2015 but I felt a stirring within me trying to communicate to my heart that this is just the beginning. From the adventurous honeymoon that led to the need in reconstructing my right knee, to the confrontation of my heart at this point of my life-stage; God is fixing my broken part (in the words of my wife).
I realize God's love confronts and exposes the areas of my heart which are out of alignment to His blueprint of my life; thus He brings discipline and correction to straighten me up (like how I need to expose my knee for the doctor to bring correction and alignment to the original state). At the same time because of His love, He covers my weaknesses and the multitude of sin with grace and tenderness. He never despise my brokenness, but with compassion He gives strength and power to overcome when I choose to respond to His heart in humility and confidence.
Somehow I feel like the blind man, Bartimaeus who lived in the comfort of his handicap for who knows how long since the day he started begging in the streets of Jericho. He can shout and call out to Jesus as much as he wants, not until then when he decided to throw off the comfort of his beggars cloak, a false sense of security and identity that he found comfort in, he will remain a blind man begging and living off the labor of people.
I am confronted by the handicap of my life as I cross over into my 30s and new life-stage as a husband. I grew up living a life without proper discipline. I live my life with no accountability, failed my exams and lived off opportunities and open doors that God gave. I've seen God moved and worked in ways that sometimes people wondered how did I survived till today. My respond to them is simply this: God will never fail in being faithful to those who set their hearts on Him and put their faith in Him. I guess when you have nothing to hold on to in life and you have nothing to lose. It is way easier to trust in God when you have nothing. You may say, isn't that a good thing? Yes it is, but the truth is there are still broken area in my life since the days of youth that has not been dealt with. And I know those areas are the cloak that I've hold on to so tightly; my false sense of security and identity.
Thus I have decided to stop social media and give myself space and time to grow in the area of discipline. I am a little tired building castles in the air, loving only the idea of changing the world and living for Jesus instead of letting my life speak for itself. I believe it is time to take my life, Jesus and His word seriously. I desire to fulfill all that He has mandated me to do with the time given me on this side of eternity.. be it long or short.
Thus, I have decided to throw off my cloak, embrace the beckoning of Jesus and follow Him...